


Intrepid Hearts

by Neverever



Category: Marvel 616, The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Crushes, Early in Canon, Guilt, Identity Porn, M/M, Misunderstandings, Pining
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-07
Updated: 2017-01-07
Packaged: 2018-09-12 10:35:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,506
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9067936
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Neverever/pseuds/Neverever
Summary: Tony hangs around the mansion more after Steve is seriously hurt in an explosion caused by Iron Man. Steve likes Tony but doesn't know why Tony is upset all the time. Maybe Iron Man is the problem.





	

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Lilian_Cho](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lilian_Cho/gifts).



> This is a Captain America/Iron Man Holiday Exchange gift for Lilian_Cho. Hope you like the story!
> 
> (And a big thank you to my beta, arms_plutonic, who made a big effort to beta the fic when she had no time.)

Steve is adjusting as best he can in the 21st century. Tony Stark has been the absolute tops at helping out. And he likes working with his new team, although he prefers if they worked together a bit better.

Like today, as in right now. 

A gang is holded up in a warehouse on the docks. They somehow got their hands on future weapons left behind by Kang after his last encounter with the Avengers. It’s proving to be difficult to roust them from the warehouse. Everyone is getting cranky and tired and just wants the whole damn thing to be over, even the criminals.

It’s Steve’s circus and monkeys so he has to get the team to wrap it up. He’s been as patient as he can be. At least he can count on Wasp and Iron Man to be reliable. The rest of the team is all over the map. 

Iron Man is flying around the warehouse rapidly relaying all the information he finds about the gang and their weapons. It’s not good -- the Avengers have been battling the gang for about a half hour and they only managed to take out a couple of gang members and Kang weapons. 

He ponders the next steps that they can take. Hawkeye, standing behind him, shouts a warning, “Hey, they’re trying to escape.”

Steve rushes forward ready to stop the gang’s getaway. He stands his ground right in front of the warehouse loading dock. 

“I’ve got this!” Iron Man shouts. He aims at the warehouse and shoots the repulsors. The warehouse next door blows up in a huge multi-colored explosion of fireworks.

Steve feels the shock wave sweep over him and he’s flung into the sky. His first thought is “This is gonna hurt.” The second: “I’m going to wake up in the hospital.”

~~~~~

When Steve wakes up in the hospital, he smells the flowers before actually seeing them. He’s hooked up to a dozen different machines. He’s tired from his body working overtime to fix all the damage. He takes a survey to assess his current state. He’s alive, which is a good thing, and he’s conscious, which still is good. But he can feel a tug on his leg, which registers as a cast, which is not a good thing. 

Satisfied, he opens his eyes and finds a red-eyed Tony Stark, shirt rumpled, suit coat tossed over the back of his seat, and red tie loose around his neck, reading his phone and flower arrangements on a table next to him. Steve immediately feels guilty having made Tony leave his all-important business to come tend to someone stupid enough not to run in time from an explosion.

“Cap, are you okay?” Tony asks, his blue eyes full of concern.

Steve has asked him repeatedly to call him Steve. But it doesn't stick for some reason. “When am I getting out of here? Today?”

Tony glances down at the floor. “No, the doctors are generally wary about discharging people a couple of hours after they’ve been nearly killed in an explosion. That applies even to you.”

Steve does not feel like he almost died. He’s just really tired and he’s been tired lots of times. “Oh, okay, a couple of days then. How’s the team?”

“I’ll talk to Iron Man about his actions --”

“He didn’t do anything wrong,” Steve states firmly. Iron Man is his best teammate and he knows in his gut that Iron Man did the right thing.

Tony stares at the same spot on the floor. Steve figures that Tony has a lot on his mind about business and inventing. “Guess so,” Tony says finally. 

Steve just smiles at the man. Tony means many things to him, but they hardly ever get to spend any time together. Even though Steve is banged up, leg in a cast, and attached to monitors and IVs, he’s happy to be here since Tony’s there. “So what are you working on?”

Tony snorts. “I’ve been working on the new satellite --”

The doctors outright refuse to discharge Steve five hours after the accident or even the day after. Steve listens as patiently as he can to their news. Lots of concerns about internal injuries and bleeding and a truckload of other damage all bundled up with a stern lecture about his health and safety. Steve can’t seem to convince them that he can be patched up and sent home.

His hospital room is full of flowers, a new bouquet arriving nearly on the hour. Steve admires each one and then sends the new arrival off to another room, just to spread the happiness around. He doesn’t need a florist shop for a room. 

Clint frowns at the flowers. “What the hell is going on?” he demands. “I could be in ICU for a month and no one would send me flowers.”

Jan laughs from her seat next to Steve. “I’d send you flowers.”

“Who’s sending all this crap?” 

Steve shrugs. “Don’t know.” There’s never a note, but he guesses that Tony is behind it. Or in reality, he’s hoping Tony’s behind it. But he’ll never tell Clint that.

“You need to get better soon,” Jan says. “Iron Man is always asking about you. Tony’s developed this depressing habit of moping about the mansion.”

“No one knew about the illegal fireworks factory,” Steve explains. “There’s no way that Iron Man could have known -- it’s no one’s fault.”

It takes nearly a week to escape the hospital. The nurses, doctors and aides all adore Steve, but his desperate need to get back on his feet and get out into the world wears on their nerves. 

Tony arranges for his chauffeur, Happy Hogan, to pick Steve up at the hospital. He apologizes for not being there when Steve is discharged. Steve is just happy to be heading home. All in a day’s work for an Avenger.

~~~~~

Chair of the Avengers that month, Jan refuses to clear Steve for active duty, at least until the cast is off and maybe not even then. Steve tries hard but fails to take the benching gracefully. He’s itchy all over being confined to quarters, so to speak. Iron Man silently watches Steve bobbing around on his crutches around the mansion.

He puts up with the indignity one more day until he can’t stand it. A solution strikes him and he acts without thinking.

“What are you doing?” Tony Stark asks as he finds Steve and Clint in the workshop.

Clint is holding his cast while Steve is trying to find a good spot to start the hacksaw blade. “Um, nothing,” Clint responds in the great tradition of everyone ever caught doing something stupid.

Seeing the stricken look on Tony’s face, Steve feels as guilty as when he tore his shirt fighting the neighbor bully when he was seven. He doesn’t want to alarm Tony who is just the greatest guy ever and gives so much to everyone. “Um, we’re just checking out my leg.”

“I hope you’re doing better,” Tony says hopefully.

“Yes, a lot better,” Steve responds with what is likely a silly look on his face. It never hurts to hear nice things from Tony. 

Steve stills cuts off the cast later with the hacksaw but he feels terrible about it. He doesn’t like the idea of disappointing Tony.

~~~~~

The afternoon light streams in the open French doors of his balcony and the sheer curtains float in the breeze. Steve is painting in the little sitting room just off his bedroom. And Steve is at peace for once in the world. It’s been about three weeks since the accident and life is getting back to normal.

For the most part that is. Iron Man is barely around and Tony is always underfoot at the mansion, showing up with takeout one night or sitting in on Avengers meetings. Steve’s not complaining at all. He’s always had a soft spot for the inventor. 

He continues to sketch out the team portrait he’s been working on for the past month. Nothing appears quite right to his eye -- he can’t get the composition the way he envisions it. He adds in and then takes out and then adds in Tony. He doesn’t like Tony next to Iron Man, they’re too much alike in form and height. He draws in Tony next to himself, and immediately erases the lines because it still doesn’t seem right to him.

Giving up, he decides to work on his painting of the Hulk, the person who least reminds him of Tony. It would be good color practice to work on shading in green, black and purple. 

He mixes up different greens and the thought pops in head, “What would it be like if Tony loved me back?” 

Steve smiles briefly as he ponders the thought. He wishes that he was as smooth and brilliant around people as Tony is. All Steve does is get tongue-tied and awkward around the clever, talented man who is clearly one of the bright lights of the century Steve woke up in. But that doesn’t mean that Steve can’t dream about taking the man out on a date. Or kissing him.

~~~~~

“You need to talk to Tony,” Hank complains to Steve at an Avenger debriefing. “It’s like he is still punishing Iron Man for messing up that mission --”

“The one that put you in the hospital,” Jan adds. “Tony just worries about the team. He might be working with Iron Man to fix the suit or something.”

“But we need Iron Man,” Pietro says bluntly. “He’s the heaviest hitter on the team besides Thor.”

Yet another reason that Tony is an amazing person -- the magnificent design of the Iron Man suit. Steve isn’t sure who Iron Man actually is -- the Avengers thought for a long time that Tony had hired a bodyguard to serve in the armored suit. But Steve’ pet theory is that Iron Man really is a robot. 

Steve wouldn’t put it past the extraordinary Tony Stark to have designed a robot bodyguard when he couldn’t hire the security a man in his situation needed. Iron Man constantly surprised Steve with his mobility, fast repulsors, and precision flying. Steve has spent more time than he wants to admit sorting out all the clues to what or who Iron Man is. The easiest solution is that Iron Man was a robot and Tony didn’t want anyone to find out.

“You should talk to Tony, Steve,” Jan urges. “He listens to you.”

He frowns. “I don’t know --”

Clint, Pietro and Wanda exchange an indecipherable look. Wanda smiles and pats Steve’s arm. “Tony prizes your opinion, Cap.”

Steve doesn't quite see that but he’ll give it the good ol’ college try. “I’ll see about getting Iron Man on the team again.”

~~~~~

He finds Tony in the library, nose buried in a book. Steve is surprised that Tony is reading a physical book, not the ever-present tablet. 

“There you are,” Tony says with a brilliant smile.

Steve is stunned at how wonderful Tony looks in his gray bespoke designer suit, a rich purple tie that brings out his dazzling blue eyes, and shiny shoes. Steve focuses on the shoes because the words keep sticking in his throat and somehow directing his attention to the floor is safe. “Hello, um, Tony.” 

Tony closes the book and picks up his bourbon. “I thought I’d find you here earlier.”

“I’ve been training most of the day. And there was an Avengers meeting -- that’s what I wanted to talk about --”

“What are you training for?”

“Um, fighting techniques. I was sparring with Thor --”

Tony nearly chokes on his drink. “Thor?”

Steve talks excitedly about the day’s training exercise. “Yes, I was using the shield against Thor and Mjolnir. Then we tried out what would happen if I threw the shield and Thor hit it with his hammer -- the shield ricocheted wildly. But we’ve got something great there -- if we could just get the timing right. Getting hit by the shield or the hammer stings bad.”

Tony had gone pale. “Cap -- are you telling me that you got hit by Thor’s hammer?”

“Maybe one or twice.” Steve winces. “Maybe four times.” He had to admit -- it hurt like hell.

Steve freezes as Tony stands up and puts a warm hand on his arm. “Cap -- Steve, do you know how dangerous that is?”

He musters up a brave smile. “No more than what I face everyday in the field.” He bites his lip as he looks at Tony. Tony is a brave man -- he doesn’t need to call Steve that.

Tony shakes his head. “You almost died in that explosion a few weeks ago.”

“Accidents happen -- we train to be prepared in case things don’t go our way.”

Tony is just a touch shorter than Steve, so when he stands close to Steve -- so close that Steve can smell his cologne which makes his knees a little wobbly -- Steve can look into those dazzling eyes. Steve could get lost in the depths of those eyes if given the chance. Yet he’s also very much aware that the big brave superhero attitude is not going over well with Tony.

“You could have died,” Tony repeats. 

“But I didn’t.” Steve glances down at Tony’s plush lips. So close and he can almost taste Tony. A step closer and he could kiss the man that haunts his dreams.

Then oddly, Tony seems to collapse in himself and what appeared to be open a second ago is closed off. Tony steps back and shakes his head. “Stay safe, Steve. We don’t have the Avengers if we lose you.”

That night after another dinner and movie night with Tony and the team, Steve has a sleepless night thinking of Tony in the library. Something’s not right and he can’t put his finger on it. Not at all. Or worse, he blew something, something big, with Tony. He’s hasn’t been this miserable in years (except for when he woke up from the ice, but nothing would ever top that).

~~~~~

Tony comes across Steve, Clint, Pietro and Hank with a tablet in the mansion foyer.

“Are you seriously planning to jump off the landing with that?” Tony asks again, blue eyes silently pleading with Steve.

Steve looks at the air mattress in his hands and the pile of rope and carabiners at his feet, and back at his teammates. It all made sense when the team talked about it over breakfast. “Training exercise?”

Tony rolled his eyes. “Really?”

He shouldn’t probably tell Tony about his recent idea that he really doesn't need a parachute when he jumps out of a plane. “Well -- we were thinking that we could rig up the mattress and --”

“Don’t give me a heart attack,” Tony snaps. “I could have walked right into whatever the hell you guys were trying to do and, and, and ….” He throws up his hands.

Steve slumps a little. He knows all about Tony’s weak heart and he would never hurt Tony for all the tea in China. Now that they’ve taken a break, Steve can see how crazy the team’s plans were. “Okay, Tony. Let’s put it all back, guys.”

Tony has a smile back on his face. “Thanks, Steve.”

~~~~~

The Black Knight teams up with Loki to cause a traffic meltdown in Manhattan. They probably mean to steal from a bank. The Avengers stop them in time, but the resulting carnage causes major havoc on the roads. 

Steve is in full Captain America mode trying desperately to coordinate the police response. He wonders if they should just give up and call in the national guard to get the roads clear and traffic moving. What makes it worse is that Iron Man refuses to leave his side.

Ordinarily Steve would be quite happy with Iron Man around. But the robot has attached itself to him and is mowing down anything that could be perceived as a threat. Handy in a fight, not so handy when Steve is negotiating with a no-nonsense city emergency response team. Iron Man hovers threateningly around him as he tries to talk.

Finally, frustrated Steve snaps. “Step back and down, Iron Man.”

“Excuse me?” Iron Man says in his computer-generated voice.

Steve’s mind registers that this is not the usual Iron Man response. But he can’t stop and ask what just happened. “Go help Wasp,” he commands, waving a glove in Wasp’s general direction as she is blasting Loki.

Iron Man doesn’t move for two entire minutes and then he takes off to join the team. Steve again records the strange response but goes back to working out the traffic problem.

~~~~~

Unlike the rest of the team, Steve stays behind to oversee clean-up and debrief the mayor’s office about the fight. It’s very late at night when he returns. No one is around -- either asleep or out partying. Except for Iron Man, who is sitting bolt upright in the Library.

Steve is a little creeped out, to be honest. It’s very unsettling, the robot staring straight ahead at nothing. “Uh, hello,” he said. 

“Hello, Cap,” the electronic voice replies.

“I thought you returned to Stark Industries --”

“Tony Stark ordered me to make sure that you returned safe and sound after our fight this afternoon.”

“I called to say that I was fine earlier.” Steve likes cellphones a lot because of the convenience. Beats searching for a pay phone, although he can’t recall the last time he saw one in modern New York.

“Mr. Stark would be happier if I confirmed your return.”

“Well, I’m back. And heading to bed,” Steve replies. 

Iron Man stands up and salutes. He heads to the foyer so he can take off for home. He moves stiffly and slowly, unlike other times. Steve again marks that as unusual. “See you tomorrow, Iron Man,” Steve says.

“Goodnight, Cap.”

~~~~~

During his morning run, Steve can’t shake the feeling that something is wrong with Iron Man. He had acted so, well, weirdly the day before. Almost human actually. Steve decides he needs to get to the bottom of whatever was going on.

Tony is waiting for him at the mansion when he returns and Steve is automatically in a better mood from just seeing his smile. He has a lot of little things he’s invented for the Avengers that he wants to show Steve. 

Steve has a great lunch with Tony and they end up talking for a couple of hours about Star Trek. He can’t think of a better way of spending his time. He even brushes his hand against Tony’s every now and then. He hopes he’s not imagining that he caught Tony staring at him. He feels a warmth in his core that he hasn’t felt in ages. 

Of course, just as things are looking up for Steve, Loki for some reason decides to make another nuisance of himself.

The general Avengers alarm blares through the mansion. “I have to go,” he says reluctantly to Tony. 

“Totally understand,” Tony replies as he stands. “It’s Avengers’ business after all.”

Steve nods and turns to rush off to join the team. He knows, though, that he really did hear Tony say, “Be safe, Steve.”

Loki is attacking an AIM facility in Michigan. Steve can’t think of a worse combination of things to go wrong, unless somehow HYDRA got involved. They’ll be fighting on two fronts. “Where’s Iron Man?” he barks into the comms.

Wasp replies. “He said he’ll join us there.”

The fight turns out to be as god-awful as Steve thought it would be. Loki dispatches clones all over the places driving the team absolutely crazy chasing after illusions. Then AIM keeps sneaking past the police cordon to fight Loki on their own. Steve fights the agents as fiercely as he can, getting seriously banged up the longer the fight goes on. The only reason the Avengers make any progress is that Iron Man and Thor hold the line.

After a couple of hours, they chase off a defeated Loki and round up a number of angry AIM agents. Steve is immensely pleased by the work of his team. He walks through the quiet quinjet telling each team member how pleased he is by their work. He finds Iron Man in the back, sitting on the floor, clearly exhausted, if robots get exhausted.

“Iron Man?” Steve asks. He touches the armor and the faceplate slides up. He didn’t know that the helmet could do that.

That would have been a shock in itself. Except the bigger shock is that it is Tony under that mask. 

“Tony?” Steve asks.

“What? Where?” Tony says with alarm as he jerks awake and looks around. He sees Steve, and sinks back down.

Steve wrestles with what to say to his friend. He settles on, “Are you okay?”

Tony struggles a moment. “I’m fine, just tired.”

“We’ll be back in New York soon.” Steve stands up.

“Wait -- don’t be angry --” Tony pleads. 

“Honestly, Tony, I don’t know what to say. I’m too tired to be shocked right now. But I really hope that you didn’t put on the suit in order to protect me.”

Tony looks strangely relieved. “Yes, that’s it. You know, I’ve been worried ever since the explosion and thought I could protect you. Just like Iron Man.”

“So Iron Man is a person?”

“Well -- yeah -- most of the time. Last guy in the suit didn’t do such a good job looking out after you, so I --”

Steve stiffens up. He may not be as smart as Tony, but he’s putting two and two together. “You fired whoever was Iron Man because of the explosion. And since then you’ve been filling in as Iron Man.”

“Uh, maybe,” Tony replies. “Just until I can hire a new guy.”

He’s crushed. He never thought that Tony of all people, Tony who is generous and kind and giving and smarter than anyone else and who cares about the people who work for him, would fire someone over an accident. Steve pulls himself together, swallowing down his disappointment. “I’m sorry to hear that, Mr. Stark. I’ll let you know when we’ve arrived.”

“Wait, Steve, don’t go -- it’s not what you think --”

Steve’s heard that line from supervillains before. It just cuts deeper to hear it from Tony as an excuse for what he did. He keeps walking back to the cockpit.

When he gets back to New York, he has a lot of thinking to do.

~~~~~

Steve holes up in his room, away from the rest of the team celebrating Loki’s defeat as best as exhausted superheroes can do. He can’t put Tony out of his mind. He can still work with Tony, that’s a given. But he’s not sure if he feels quite the same as before. 

There’s a knock at the door. 

Feeling miserable, he doesn’t want to answer. It could be Jan wanting to cheer him up. He doesn’t want cheering up. He wants Tony to be the man he thought Tony was. But Steve’s been wrong before about people, maybe he’s wrong now.

“Steve, please,” Tony begs on the other side of the door. “I know I’m the last person you want to see right now but -- look, Jan will kick my ass if I go back down without talking to you.”

Not the most persuasive argument, but Steve can also imagine what an angry Jan was capable of. “Come in.”

He has never seen this version of Tony, with red-rimmed eyes, wild hair, in jeans and a t-shirt and sneakers. Tony suddenly seems a lot younger and lot more vulnerable, and Steve notices a blue glow under the t-shirt he had never seen before. 

“I’m Iron Man,” Tony announces. 

Steve sighs. Already he regrets allowing Tony through the door. 

“No -- stop. I’ve always been Iron Man,” Tony continues. “It’s been me, all the time, in the suit. It’s a long story but that’s what’s been going. No one else, just me.”

Steve isn’t expecting that. He’s confused. “What?”

“I can’t have the stockholders and my enemies know that I’m Iron Man. Another long story. So when you found out, I panicked and decided to try to bluff it through. I felt like crap that I set off an explosion that nearly killed you but I didn’t fire someone because of it. Because that person is me and I can’t fire myself.” Tony offers a half-smile, clearly hoping he’s explaining enough to Steve.

Steve’s head hurts. He feels lighter, knowing that Tony didn’t do anything despicable. But the whole secret identity issue and the couple of years of working with Tony as Iron Man is a hell of a lot of news that Steve isn't ready to sort out after a long day. So he fastens on one thing he can sort out. “You’re blaming yourself for the explosion?”

“Yeah -- I have this suit and all the equipment and computers and I didn’t know I hit a fireworks warehouse until I did. And you could have died.”

“But I didn’t and you didn’t know. We always run into problems and situations we can't control,” Steve says. “Stop blaming yourself.”

“But, Steve, if you died, I couldn’t live with myself,” Tony blurts out.

“Okay. But I didn’t,” Steve repeats. “I’m here, in one piece. Wait -- you’ve been hanging around because --”

“Do you know how much crazy stuff you get into? You do things all the time that could kill you,” Tony says. “I wanted to protect you but I can’t! Even as Iron Man!”

Steve’s head hurts even more. So he makes things worse by pulling Tony into his arms and planting a big kiss on him to shut him up. It wasn’t the most romantic kiss Steve’s ever had, but definitely in the top ten, especially when Tony gets with the program and kisses Steve back.

Breaking off the kiss, Steve squeezes Tony. “Look, we have too much to talk about tonight.” He presses Tony’s forehead into his shoulder as he feels Tony start to shake. “It will be okay.” Steve knows that he’s terrible at comforting people. But if he fails this, he loses Tony. “Let’s just sit here and work it out in the morning.”

“Morning,” Tony repeats. 

“Yeah, it will be better in the morning.”

“With our luck, we’ll be attacked by Loki and an army of angry rabbits.”

“At least I know you’ll be in the suit on my right,” Steve answers. 

He feels Tony’s smile on his skin. “Yeah, I’ll always be there.”

“Good. And promise you’ll knock off thinking that you nearly killed me. I’m sure I’ll return the favor some day.”

Tony unwinds himself from Steve’s arms and sits down on the bed. “Oh really?”

Steve shimmies over the bed to sit close to Tony, unwilling to let him go. “Yeah. It’s part of the whole superhero business.”

“Yeah, it is, isn’t it?” Tony concedes. He kisses Steve again. “But it makes this part a hell of lot better.”


End file.
